A New Year’s Dump

I have a softball game at 8 and writing this entry is partially an attempt to prevent myself from eating. I’m pretty hungry, but eating now would make me feel heavy during my game. I hate that feeling. I also hate the feeling that I might have to throw a deuce in the middle of a game, so I’m sucking on a cough drop instead. I will likely subsist on sunflower seeds until after the game, at which point perhaps hopefully Matty and I will partake in a New Years Taco Bell meal.

Even the water in the stream was moving faster.

Even the water in the stream was moving faster.

About 10 minutes after I got up, the garbage truck came around to empty the trash bins near our home. Thank. God. I made three trips to those bad boys before loading the car with large items to dump in Waipahu. The whole trip to the dump and back took about an hour, which is only about 30 minutes longer than my usual dumps, so pretty good, no?

The line for drop-off was pretty long, so I had a little alone time which has been scarce so far this break. I listened to a sports podcast and exchanged text messages with Brett about the status of the Dallas Cowboys coaching staff. The highlight, though, was actually dumping some of the large objects that have been sitting around our house forever, just waiting for a huge green metallic container to call home. There’s something satisfying about the process of lifting a shitty old vacuum above a pile of broken objects, holding the shitty vacuum still for a second, then letting go. There is a beat of silence before a thunderous crash that I would consider irritating had I not created the thunder myself. It’s cathartic, really. I want to bring Lynnette there one day so she too, can experience this joy of letting go.

I'm impressed.

I’m impressed.

Lynnette stayed home from work today with a mean tummy ache. She spent most of the morning in the bedroom curled up in the fetal position with Abby tucked between the knees and elbows for added warmth. When she finally got up, she washed herself up and wandered into her new walk-in closet. “You don’t have to do that,” I said. I was concerned that the physical strain would exacerbate her tummy ache. “I’m fine,” she said. “I just feel like I have to be close to the bathroom,” she continued. Wait? Lynnette spent the day cleaning the house and in a state of hyper-awareness of the fluctuating status of her stomach? WELCOME TO MY WORLD, WIFE.

I am actually proud of her, though, she added two bags of clothing to our donation pile. We were supposed to take care of that today, but Madison made bad life choices yesterday, and thus cost herself a return trip to 808 Bounce. We will take the clothes to Goodwill tomorrow before Madison resumes her bouncing and I resume my grading. Many of you already know that the reason I proposed to Lynnette at the stroke of midnight is because she clings to a superstition which holds that whatever you are doing at that transitional moment is how you’re going to spend the rest of your year. I thought it would be super cool if I led with that, then asked her “What about the rest of your life, then?” Anyway, I have no qualms about grading on New Year’s Eve because I know that it is my destiny to grade from now until June.

At least she didn't drop the can into the pot this time.

At least she didn’t drop the can into the pot this time.

All that cleaning made me pretty hungry. All that watching other people clean also made the Goob hungry. She and I collaborated on putting together a lunch of chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. It was good, there just wasn’t enough of it.

What I’m going to write next isn’t break-though stuff, but I love it when Madison is in her helpful mood. She genuinely enjoys doing things together and being a part of menial tasks like cooking, vacuuming, or helping me with the laundry. On the other end of the spectrum is Whiny Madison AKA Fussy Madison AKA I Wish You Took a Nap Madison. Whenever she’s in this alter ego, she’s demanding, impolite, and she makes bad life choices. I’m trying to break her from these habits.

That's great.

That’s great.

Highlight Time: I was in the bedroom trying to nap when I heard Madison shout “Dad!” from the living room. She was really excited about something. She came into the room holding a toilet paper roll. “Look at my Fake-Dama!” she shouted. Apparently, Lynnette had used a toilet paper roll, tape, a string of yarn, and a penny to construct a very, very makeshift kendama-like device. “I got it in once!” she screamed. I spent the next few moments watching her attempt the trick again. She held the fake-dama out, away from her body and swing it wildly. I believe she was wary of blasting herself in the eye with the penny like she has several times with her other fake-dama. “This is the fakest kendama!” Madison shouted. She’s so smart.

This was the last exchange I had before passing out. Luckily, I didn’t dream about it. It was something about being stuck in traffic instead.

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