I’m just skipping ahead to Friday because I spent Thursday morning grading, then drove all the way to Koko Head to get 10-run-ruled by Maryknoll. That’s about all I want to say about that.
Lynnette had a doctor’s appointment in the middle of the day and she had some glide time lying around, so she spent the Friday of Spring Break with Madison and I. Considering Lynnette and I plowed through 5 or 6 New Girl episodes on Netflix (completing the available episodes) last night, getting out of the house for breakfast before 9 was a pretty fair show of dedication. Madison’s quest to devour everything in sight has continued through Spring Break and this morning was no different. She ate her eggs, some of her bacon, one of Lynnette’s crepes, and a few bites of my pancakes. She might also have a little blood in her sprunch vessels at this point.
Lynnette suggested walking off breakfast at Wahiawa Botanical Gardens. I didn’t know such a thing existed before today, but it was nice. Nearly all of the paths were shaded and I did not detect the presence of mosquitoes – despite Madison scratching her legs intermittently. Everything was going well until Lynnette pointed out a huge spider web with a spider sitting in its center. Madison hates and is scared of spiders, and while this wasn’t the fake sand crab incident, it did unleash whiny Madison.
Lynnette and I wanted to explore the park, but Madison was only concerned with trying to make her way back to the safety of the gravel paths on the uppermost level of the garden. I lingered, hoping to snap a few snazzy pictures of my girls, a few non-humans, and possibly nature. I was setting up for a picture when a bird unloaded its feces on my head.
I wasn’t angry. My first reaction was concern; I just didn’t want any bird crap on the camera. Once I gave that a check, I realized that the bomb had grazed my head, but made its primary impact on my left foot – right at the edge of my slipper near the toes. That’s right, I had to walk back to the wash area with bird crap rubbing between my toes. So awesome.
Lynnette spent the rest of the morning cheering on her Creighton Blue Jays in the NCAA Basketball Tournament. I took video of her support of her alma mater, but she’s figured out a way to prevent me from posting the footage on Instagram and other social media sites: she says indecent things while I’m recording. As we watched Creighton close out the game, she clapped while saying “penis, penis, penis!” The surprise move flustered me. She intentionally ruined the video by breaking the fourth wall with penises. Sheer evil genius. But there’s a flaw in her plan. It worked this time because it took me by surprise. She’s also banking on my morality, but I think we all know that’s a huge, huge mistake. This is what life is all about: making adjustments. Lynnette figured out my sneaky video techniques and came up with an effective strategy to prevent them. Now it’s my turn to adjust to the adjustment. Keep winning, Blue Jays. I can do this all day. All day!