Errands: The Perfect Summer Jam!

Remember that End-of-the-Summer Extravaganza that was supposed to happen because Lynnette stayed home from work today? It got cancelled. Instead of an all-out rager, we did the most adult of things: we ran a bunch of errands.

This is what procrastination looks like.

This is what procrastination looks like.

The safety check for the Highlander was due by the end of the month so Lynnette basically blackmailed us into getting it taken care of today. I was told we could do it today, I could take care of it tomorrow, or we could wait until the weekend when all the other procrastinators would be seeking to get their checks done as well. She was right, though, I can’t lie. I could have easily taken care of the safety check earlier in the month, but waited on that, too. There’s a lesson here about procrastination but if it hasn’t taken during the first 35 years of my life, it’s not going to take now.

Local stores don't carry Uber Fine, Supreme Fine, or Ultimate Fine.

Local stores don’t carry Uber Fine, Supreme Fine, or Ultimate Fine.

Speaking of procrastination, there was an epic cluster-eff at Fisher’s Hawaii because of last-minute back-to-school shoppers. We know that because we had to return to Fisher’s because I inadvertently selected the wrong Sharpie for Mad last weekend. I made the boneheaded mistake of selected the Ultra Fine point rather than the Extra Fine point. Just so there’s no confusion, neither of these is Too Fine (the point named after Lynnette) nor is it It’s Fine (the #1 rated Sharpie among women in long-term relationships). The lists are so detailed. Honestly, I know what my list would look like as a DOE teacher.

1. Some pens in a bunch of colors.

2. A whole thing of pencils for when we use Scantron sheets, just so you don’t have break someone else’s pencil in half to take the test.


If I spent what today’s ring cost on her actual wedding band, I suppose her facial expression would be much, much different.

Yesterday was the last day Lynnette was able to wear her wedding band. Her double-pregnancy has her all swole, and she can no longer wear the most expensive thing I have ever purchased. She expressed interest in wanting to get a temporary replacement and I was all for it. The trip to Fisher’s and this jaunt to Pearlridge destroyed our plans to visit the pool, and Madison was not pleased. Lynnette and I tried our best to explain to Madison that Mem felt very awkward without a symbol of our love, and it could not wait until the weekend (kind of like one’s safety check, you’ll note). I tried to soften the blow by telling Madison she could have the ring after Lynnette gave birth to the twins. “That’s right!” Lynnette said. “But I’m never getting married, you guys know that,” Madison said. It’s a long story, but the abridged version is as follows. Madison never wants to: get married, move out of our house, go to college, have her own kids, sleep in her own room. It’s going to be amazing to watch her walk back all of those opinions.

That's WWE Superstar Mem Higa as Charizard.

That’s WWE Superstar Mem Higa as Charizard posing for charcoal-on-paper sketch aboard the Titanic.

I took a nap when we got back home and awoke to find the girls embroiled in a heated game of Battleship. Apparently, the game ended in a tie because we had to leave the house to check Madison in at her classroom before anyone won or lost. In fact, I have nothing to say about this game and only mentioned it because I really wanted to post this picture. I love Lynnette with a kind of ferocity that manifests itself in the stupidest of ways. I can’t really explain it. I make up nicknames for her, I make up lyrics to songs for her. I even come up with bedtime stories for Madison with Lynnette as one of the central characters. Lynnette likes to claim that I just enjoy making fun of her. That’s part of it. But I think it stems from the fact that I’m thinking about her all the time and all the dumb stuff I say and write is just rattling around up there. Eventually, it’s going to come out. Often.

Man, it's hot.

One day, my daughter will be able to carry all her school supplies.

That last errand of the day was the aforementioned early check-in at Mad’s classroom. Her first day of second grade is Wednesday. Sadly, that’s also my first day of meetings for work. That’s right. Tomorrow is the very last day of summer. Mad and I have yet to make plans, and I admit to feeling pressure to make the day something memorable. I just don’t know what that is yet. I suppose I still have time to figure it out, but man, not too much of it.




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