I took a video of Cole back in February and it is hilarious. I have not posted it online, however, because without any kind of explanation, the sequence captured appears kind of mean. I used the video in my lecture yesterday as part of an illustration of how we think about karma – or “bachi”. Immediately after I shot this video, I stepped on Abby’s deer antler and it really hurt. I unfurled a series of swear words. “Good for you,” Lynnette said. The short version is that there is often a flaw in the way we define the relationship between events.
I’m going to post the video here, but only after I explain everything:
- Some time ago, Lynnette and I noticed that Cole’s face melts in the few moments before he actually starts crying. I lack the words to explain exactly what it looks like, and I realized immediately that capturing it on video would be impossible; it would require me to know exactly when he was about to cry.
- Of all the things I call Cole, his actual name is very low on the list. I call him “boy”, “my boy,” “son”, “Phil Jr.”, and most frequently, “Chubby Boy”. When I say “Chubby Boy”, it is always with the same tone and inflection – loudly, with a lower pitch, somewhat gravelly, and if I had to type it out, it would look something like this: CHUBBY BOOOOOOOOOOY!
- My original intention in taking this video was to capture his candid behavior. But, for the first 15 seconds or so, he didn’t do anything. To fill the space, I called him Chubby Boy.
- Loud, random noises startle Cole easily. Much more easily, it seems, than they do Avery.
- I made him cry. Obviously – as you will see – it’s because he was startled. But when Lynnette watched it, she said he cried because I teased him. “I didn’t tease him, that’s his name,” I said. “His name is Cole,” she said. Legally, she’s right.
- I have resisted sharing this video because it does kind of look like Lynnette is right. Also, I felt guilty about it.
- But I inadvertently caught Cole’s face melt.
- And tragedy plus time equals comedy.
- Also, today is April Fool’s Day.
- So, I hope you don’t think I’m a horrible person/father. I’m actually not terrible and can border on good/decent.
- I apologize out loud to the computer or my phone whenever I watch it. But only after I laugh.