Bad Eating Habits

It appears that Cole and Avery have taken on one of my bad eating habits each. Even as recently as Winter Break, both behaved similarly; they ate all their food and enjoyed the snack at the end of each meal. That’s changed, though.

1Cole, the distracted eater. In the past two weeks, Cole’s transformed into something of a picky eater. He takes the first few bites of whatever he’s served, then quickly bores of it. Like me, he hates being bogged down, so Lynnette’s had to resort to giving him novelty items to occupy him. Tonight’s mystery dinner date was an empty Coke bottle. Cole tries to drink out of the top, sides, and bottom of the bottle and – since this quest is impossible – it keeps him busy enough for Lynnette to fork food into his mouth. I get it. I like watching TV, checking my phone, reading, and playing poker during my meals. Cole also seems to take joy in dropping little bits of his food off the tray for Abby. Abby, of course, loves Cole for this and hangs out under the chairs and table during meal times. Cole likes salty and bland foods, like Madison did at his age. He enjoys puffs and baby mum-mums as dessert, and is always the first to come down from the high chair because he eventually no longer wants to eat. Unlike Avery.

2Avery, the bottomless pit. Avery is so well behaved during meal time because eating is her favorite thing. Cole’s favorite thing is running around and playing. It makes sense that he has little patience for being strapped to a high chair. Avery, on the other hand, loves nothing more than to be locked into a chair and served food until there is no more food. Earlier today at my parents’ house, my mom was excited to ask Avery “who’s hungry?” because she’s seen the Gravy Boat react to quickly and enthusiastically to the question. When my mom asked today, it appeared that Avery didn’t immediately recognize the voice, but then quickly walked over to grandma with her arms up. That’s what she does – she assumes whoever asked the question is going to give her food. Avery’s setup is much simpler than Cole’s. Lynnette just gives her a spoon to hold. If anything, the only time Avery gets fussy is if she thinks food is not being delivered to her mouth quickly enough. Then, when we finally run out of food, she’s released into the play area and her belly protrudes out over the waistband of her shorts. It’s the one time she looks anything like me at all.

3Since we’re on the topic of bad eating habits, Avery’s really taken things to another level. As you know, Avery has the particular habit of chewing on everything. We found out today that this also applies to the submarine I made out of cardboard boxes. I built the submarine to fit both Cole and Avery at the same time, but it does get a little crowded. We noticed Avery began to gnaw on the cardboard at the bottom of one of the “windows” I had cut out. Lynnette taped the edge to prevent her from doing more damage to the Blue and Orange October. Well, according to Madison, Cole was in the way of Avery’s preferred dining area aboard the sub, and so she tried to eat him instead. Cole’s got teeth marks on his arm.

You know, when the doctor revealed to us that we were going to have twins, my mind exploded and imagined thousands of hypothetical scenarios at once. None of them, however, involved one child biting the other. And yet here we are.

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